boys and girls, a lesson in pathology
this will be the first and last time, i promise. trust your gut (pun intended) when it comes to food. i had this cup of ramen sitting in my locker since God knows when. i scanned the packaging for the expiry date, but could not find any. this should have served as my first warning. so i figured, hey what the heck. it’s dried foodstuff and decided to go ahead in chowing them stale ramen.
my second warning should have hit home right there and then, but i blame it on the mild flu i am having. it kinda screws with your judgement. the seasoning packet felt stiff to the touch and i found the powder had lumped into this solid block of cancer causing chemical additive. someone was trying to tell me something, but i chose not to listen. add some hot water and then closed the lid and let thermal magic work its’ stuff.
now, i have tasted many types of ramen (instant noodles) in my life. none as foul as this! the ramen itself had this plastic-ky taste to it. hooray for my blocked nose, i was waylaid into thinking it was the freeze-dried mushrooms. however, after two forkfulls, something told me to stop or be doomed and so i complied. i then decided it would be better to go out for lunch. i’ve been couped up in the office in front of my monitor long enough, the past couple of days.
fast forward to a much later time, nausea hit me like a fat stinking whale (no offense to the poor persecuted mammals) and for the third time in my entire life, i felt like puking my guts out. thankfully, a steady stream of work from my “faithful” users kept me busy. i still felt like shit throughout the period of time though. oh wahey! turns out the 2 forkfulls must have packed a punch in my guts. i am now officially “poisoned” by a cup of suspicious ramen. i should have just said yes to Dory’s offer of good old Gardenia bread, so good you can even eat it on its’ own.
so boys and girls…what is the moral of the story? stay the hell away from ramen with no expiry date, which has been sitting in your locker for ages and then ignoring all the warning signs of impending gut-busting, puke-inducing, head-thomping unadulterated vile evil…where was i? oh yeah…eat healthy and stay away from the junk food. stay safe. i’m gonna go see if i can get the crap, out of my system.
